FOUR WAYS TO RESHAPE NEGATIVE EXPERIENCES

Regardless of your past or present circumstances, your destiny holds even more love and life. Every experience, including challenges, mistakes, losses and unexpected changes serves a purpose.  Just like verses of an epic poem, our journeys shape us and enrich our experiences that make our stories unique.

Generally, human nature gravitates towards celebrating the positive aspects of life. However, the real challenge arises when we must confront loss, setbacks and transitions. Navigating these difficulties requires honesty, resilience, consistent attention and patience.  Now is the time to draw from these experiences to create the life you have always envisioned.

Here’s how to begin:

1.       Let go to grow. 

Letting go does not mean you care less; rather, it creates space for learning, love and new experiences. Give yourself permission to grieve the impact of what you experienced. Reflecting on the past is not solely about difficult situations; but also the positive changes in your personal life, career, or livelihood that can feel uncomfortable.  If your change is not about overcoming challenges or emotional pain, it may require shifting your perspective about your self-worth being defined by a former status or title.  Start by identifying two things that have been difficult to release. 

2.       Celebrate your wins. 

Write a list of your big and small successes of the experience. Identify and share your lessons learned that could benefit others.  Thank those who supported you along the way.  Make time for self-care activities.

3.       Take inventory of the situation. 

Be honest with yourself about how the change impacts your livelihood.  Acknowledge any role you may have played in the situation. What new skills have you gained from the experience that can serve you in the future?  If given the chance, what one thing would you change about your experience?

4.       Activate your power. 

Harness the power of forgiveness to disarm the power of shame and guilt that tries to anchor your old identity in your current life. Identify any areas of unforgiveness stemming from your experience that may be influencing your life. Make space to forgive yourself. Often, we are quick to forgive others but don’t extend the same grace to ourselves.  

Beloved, remember that, “your story is still unfolding.”  While you cannot change the past, you are now empowered to use the goodness of the past to shape your future.